On comparison

….contd……

Each one of us knew how many times we’ve used words against others’ Gurus, God, religion and rituals.  We felt bad. All these days I was proud that I was staunch follower of my religion and was being very vocal about it and proving strongly that ‘others’ were mean, wrong and that only ‘I was right’. Today, I knew how wrong I was!

She got up and left. She was clearly hurt with our words and actions (that we had said and done in the past). She was in pain. We stated we wanted her presence and that we loved her. And here we were the cause of her pain and suffering. Pleading ignorance, we acted arrogance and hurt her like no one. Yet we called ourselves ‘good students’ stating to all and sundry as to how much ‘seva’ we did to her. What we thought was totally in contrast to what we actually gave her. This is ‘himsa’. This was worst form of violence. And to think that we called ourselves her students and declared that we loved her. If this was the result of our love for her, God save her from our hatred!

All our words and actions played in my minds screen. And I laughed at our audacity because we were used to asking her questions like ‘why do we have to face this problem when we are such ‘good people’ and do japam ‘X’ no. of times daily. How silly!

Now looking back at our actions, I felt what we suffered was far less than what we deserved. May be it was just ‘her Grace’ that minimised our suffering. And we didn’t even thank her enough for that! I am surprised she’s still with us, loving us. Do we really deserve her I wonder?

Restlessness made everyone get up and walk in her garden. Yet, no one was talking. Each was lost in his thoughts such as - may be digesting few of her words, reminiscing few of the past actions and working out the corrective steps for same. This was heavy for all!

Rahul served samosas to all. When he went out to purchase from a street-vendor, no one noticed. But, we all ate nonetheless – silently! Glad there was also cake served along with it. It seemed to ease us a bit. Tea followed suit. It was more than an hour that she left and we hardly noticed the time passed.  After an hour or so, she took her seat. Snacks and tea charged us and Anwar asked ‘that means we should stop comparing with others and we should compare only with ourselves – like present with past – right?’

…contd….