Sunday, July 19, 2020

Why when an answer is given, it is not taken?





(I am answering this question to sum up the answer already given - check comments section for the same)


Why when an answer is given, it is not taken?

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If we can’t afford something or can’t do or be something, the next easy thing to do is to pull “the work” down by such poetic statements.

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But 2nd shayari clearly replies that every Emperor did not make a “Taj” – not every rich man could build a Taj. One can buy expensive land, property, assets with money – but a monument which is not only expression of opulence but of finest artistic expression. In it is years of thousands of craftsmen and artisans sweat and toil. Their dedication is also part of it. Just money and hard work is again not enough. There should be ‘love’ that sustained beyond death for the beloved – and for such long period of time. And may be, that’s why one lover replied “Even I would construct a Taj for my lover if only she dies!”

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It is believed that Taj took 20 years to be completed. And the one man who was working towards is no ‘drunken lover’ or crying ‘lover’. It’s an Emperor who ruled one of the greatest countries and varied terrains of the World – The Indian Sub-continent. Not only did he rule it, it is considered to be the ‘pinnacle’ of good and prosperous period of rule under Mogul dynasty. Kingdom had flourished in every field. So, imagine the amount of his work and energy that he had to dedicate for the overseeing of such a vast Empire. Over and above that to sustain construction of a tomb and that in memory of his dead wife – not work of ordinary affection. His love for her can be only imagined if you can imagine the number of wives he had and the possibility of getting more if he desired.

Henry Ward Beecher quote: The true secret of giving advice is ...
People marry so that their ‘physical desires and needs’ are fulfilled by the spouse. For many, spouse ‘is supposed’ to fill their every need and to make them happy. Spouse is to gratify their desires. Does that not clearly say “I am using marriage and spouse for my gratification?”

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So, is my definition of love “I use “person” to gratify my desires”? In short, if I say “I love” it just means “I am using that person”. No doubt, such marriages end up giving pain and suffering to the people involved.

People are to be loved and not used.

Things are to be used and not loved!

We interchange them and lo! Our life is a mess! 

Contd.....




this link should be helpful to understand you understands and who doesn't too very clearly

Questions addressed :
  • If marriage is such a 'right institution' then how come it fails so miserably?
  • Why most of the marriages are marriage of convenient?
  • why and when happiness and marriage don't go together?
Points to b addressed :
  • An empty vessel can't fill another vessel. Like-wise, an empty person can't fill the other with affection or love.
  • Address that emptiness from within. Even if one is married to the 'perfect being' he can't 'receive' love from the perfect being as long as he is empty from within.
  • No empty well can be filled. However much you fill empty well with, it still remains empty.
  • Just as fire can't be satisfied with how ever much you feed it with, hatred and anger can't be satisfied with the things of world. Heal it before you want to create anything that is pure and beautiful.

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