Me, My Guru - On giver and receiver

Me, My Guru

On giving and receiving – Giver and receiver

Today, I didn’t have any class and yet when I called her and she said there was ongoing class I sought her permission to come around 4 pm and she okayed that request. Today, due to some internal reason, we were asked to leave by 3pm and I felt it better to attend any session at our Guru’s place than go home and sit in front of TV watching some ‘boring programme’.

I was elated when everything seemed to fall in place and left for our Guru’s place. Few students were seated under the tree as I entered the premises. I joined them after washing my feet. 

She was explaining something as I sat down to listen. 

“The school accepts the student with the hope that their training and syllabi will make a ‘man’ of that boy! They don’t filter the boy seeing his nature to be mean, selfish or dull witted. Because, school believes every child should be given education and that that education would transform their character too as they graduate out of their school. But this hope is not always fulfilled. Yet school takes in ‘new students’ too with the same hope!

Osmania Medical College teaches same syllabi to all its’ students and also gives same ethics to its’ students. Yet some ‘great innovative souls’ choose to use ‘that noble profession to ‘steal kidneys’, run organ rackets, follow unethical medical practises, perform wrong surgical procedures and what not! Is Osmania University at fault? Are the ‘professors’ there at fault? No. Isn’t it?”

Everyone agreed that it was not the fault of Osmania University or its’ lecturers/professors.

“Degree doesn’t give a person his character. He USES his degree to bring out his CHARACTER!

Similarly, I can teach what is right and yet if some ‘good souls’ choose to bend ways of healing in my name, then I am not at fault! Isn’t it?

I know what I’ve given I don’t know what you’ve received and made out of it”.

There certainly ‘seemed’ anguish and pain in her voice. But people would hardly notice that – for they would be busy judging either her or others at whom it was directed. I knew this for sure for I was at that ‘space’ not long ago!

...contd....

on the solitude!

Me, My Guru Bhagavatam – surrender

...contd....

Next the cream from this curd is taken and churned to bring out butter.

Similarly, our mind which is set on divine is churned vigorously by our own ‘samskaras’ to bring out ‘knowledge’ the butter of sadhan and it is melted to make ‘ghee’ i.e., love or bhakthi that is given as oblation ‘ahuti’ in the ‘homam fire’. It means the love or bhakthi which is the crux or any sadhan is the ‘one’ that needs to be offered to the ‘Lord’ or ‘Divine’. He loves that ‘love’ of ours for him – not the butter in physical form. (That doesn’t mean I am asking you not to give ‘butter’ as prasadam (offering) to him).

There were other points written but I didn’t find them engaging then! I was held by this ‘butter theory’. Now this ‘management tip’ seemed complete and made more sense. I could actually put lots of other data also together. Ofcourse, most of the data had been provided by our Guru at various times. Others may get it from other sources but I received most from ‘her’ and in the last 15-20 years that I had been around her. I don’t even remember how many ‘precious pearls of knowledge’ I had let scatter that she had so generously distributed to us.

Krishna’s one more name was ‘Mohan’ which means ‘man ko mohane wala’ or one entices or robs your heart/mind’ that is he is ‘the one who entices our hearts’. He is the ‘chitchor’ – stealer of heart. All this again lead us to the fact that ‘all he wanted, desired or expected from us was love’. He, thus stealing butter was symbolic of saying that all I need is ‘your heart’ or ‘love’.

And what was I doing?

Taking care of the physicality of rituals and just didn’t even bother to understand their meaning, importance and import. I was always saying “...but I go to temple, do regular pooja, chant so many times...”. I was keeping tab of all that was material oriented but my heart was enveloped in antagonising, fault-finding, anger, envy, hatred, complaining, self-pity and everything except ‘love for Krishna’.

How many times I thought about him during the day? Once, twice and I would question her “...but I am good devotee doing pooja regularly and doing charity too....then why am I suffering so much?” I laughed at my own stupidity. God, how she had put up with all this nonsense of mine all this years? I owe her a lot just for putting up with me. No doubt, it is said ‘love of Guru is fathomless – is an ocean’.

...contd....

Me, My Guru Bhagavatam – surrender

Me, My Guru

Bhagavatam – surrender

Rahul and others hadn’t attended previous class and as I missed then and also wanted to share with them as to what was taught in class, I agreed to meet them today at a park. Others met here regularly but I hardly joined them mostly because of my official constraints. Today, I rescheduled my work to squeeze this meeting with them. I was glad I did it at the end of the day too!

I met them and after exchanging pleasantries gave them “Krishna’s management tips”. They listened and then said “Good atleast you attended among us. And here take this notes from the class that you missed “I was surprised. Because all the years I have known Rahul, he has never taken notes – never! And he had taken notes on the day I was absent. I questioned him with my eyes and he chuckled before answering “yeah, I don’t take notes and I know how you are crazy about taking notes. So thought would take it down for you. Well, not as detailed as yours but...adjust yaar....”. I was touched! It meant a lot for me. She had said umpteen times “If you have heart to feel, your eyes can see love in every small acts of others”. Today I saw ‘love’.

Such small acts, talked about ‘person’s character’. She was right. One small act can define who you truly are! When I got hold of my emotion, I started going through his notes.

“Vedantic stories, itihaas, puranas weren’t some ‘hog washed wizardy stories’ written by some desperate character in a dingy tea stall.

These were written by ‘Rishis’ who were far advanced in ‘spiritual path’ and who became voice of the Divine by totally negating their ego. So, the characters and their acts weren’t something written to fill the gaps of the story or to increase the word count or the length of these tales. They are called ‘Itihaasam’ which in Sanskrit (language) means “that which happened exactly so”. It is no fiction of some mind. Now if we take Krishna’s act of stealing butter – this point becomes very clear. The spiritual truth is so effortlessly explained.

Milk is the purest form of food available to man that can be taken by toddler to ripe old man. Even the sick can digest it. Cow is considered the epitome of purity among animals and it converts grass into milk and gives us this milk. This milk is again set to become curd.

This milk should be kept at a place where it is not disturbed, otherwise it doesn’t become curd.

Like-wise everyone should go into solitude say atleast for a day and sit in meditation without external turbulence acting on his senses to enable his mind to set on the Divine. Three-days would be excellent though!

...contd....

on confusion!

If confusion is the first step

to knowledge,

I must be a genius!!!!

Me, My Guru -Bhagavatam

...contd....

But he did give management tips with live examples later part of the day was spent healing and seeking personal counselling. This was one class that didn’t have set syllabi and everyone was flexible enough to attend to personal issues too during these sessions. Our Guru had sought our opinion in this matter and as we didn’t object, she let it be for this particular class.

I was too lost imagining ‘Krishna’ as management guru to want something more. It was then that I realized something unusual. Krishna never expected anything from anyone and anywhere. He was open to experience life. He had challenges, problems at every nook and corner and yet met them head-on but with a smile on his face. His stance was composed. That’s why he enjoyed company of his friends and was equally at ease when alone! He embraced both rejecting none and that was the reason for his ‘smile’ and happiness. No doubt he was ever so calm and composed.  As our Guru was explaining something to one of her student, I overheard her say “In company and in solitude, he was happy...sangarahita, sangaviheena...nandathi, nandathi ...”

Yes! That exactly was my problem. When in company, I was mentally alone and presumed “I was longing for solitude’ or that I was in space where I was comfortable being alone. And when in class, I was looking forward to discuss with others. My expectation was not met and I felt I missed them and was confused as to why I sought company. Both times, I was not what I thought I was. My need was not my need. It was just “issue based” and I had presumed it to be ‘my nature’

now. So, I was confused as to how I can change so fast – when infact I hadn’t changed at all! I hadn’t developed a character yet. That which changes every hour can’t be ‘me’. It did say that I was fickle-minded. Yes, that can be said to be my character. That’s all! But longing for friends and seeking solitude weren’t part of my character yet – they just reflected my need of that hour only! And that was the reason for my suffering and confusion!

I thanked her silently and left her class.

Sometimes – no many times her single word had helped me ‘see’ so clearly what I couldn’t ‘see’ breaking my head.

Did I thank her enough for this? I doubted!

Did she know this? Either way, she was least bothered!

Would the same word carry same effect if heard from some other person’s mouth?

I wanted to believe the answer to be ‘yes’.

It made my journey easy – somehow!

But experience negated my desire!

And today I already had my quota of fight between two extremes. I didn’t have energy for one more. I just let it be.

I closed the gate behind me!

concluded...........

Me, My Guru Bhagavatam

...contd....

“Oh Krishna! Why are you smiling? We can’t get butter. Are you no sad?” they asked.

He started laughing his musical hearty laugh and that put their fears at rest.

“Just follow my instructions and we all can still eat all the butter” he said confidently.

They snuggled to listen to his ‘plan of action’. Then they set in action. The strong, big boys stood bent at the bottom and on them thinner boys climbed and sat bent. They formed ‘mountain of human chain’ and Krishna climbed atop all and took the pot of butter effortlessly, had his fill and passed it to others. When he and others got down, everyone shared the butter among them and had their fill”.

They left that home and also left behind empty pots. No act of Krishna or no chapter of Krishna’s life is out of place or without a lesson. Sick minds can call him ‘butter thief’. That’s their choice! But a heart that is filled with love for him knows that his acts teach us ‘how to live in this world’. He is the ‘first Management Guru’. The human mountain represents the ‘Management ladder’. The triangle shape formed is the shape of hierarchy of any management or company. At the base are the ‘people with brawns’ whom we casually call as ‘labour classes’. The group /crowd there is vast and hence the base is always large. But as the management or hierarchy increases, it thins and finally at the top is ‘Krishna’ – the Master Planner – the one person who strategizes and gives his action plan to be executed by others. He is the ‘Mental man’ meaning one with brains.

One with brains is always at the top and the one with brawn forms the bottom crust of any organisation. Only when all together work in co-ordination with each other, can they get the ‘butter’ of hard work – the profits, name, fame etc for organisation which is then distributed among everyone – when this is properly done every time, only then can such an organisation – go for next successful venture. If the top management when receives butters out of greed if it takes it all, then next time the base level wouldn’t co-operate and the organisation would face labour problems, strikes and what not!”

She left us for tea-break. I had never seen Krishna in this light and it really amused me. I found others too talking on similar grounds. It was really enriching class. Aziz had something to sit-on being in management line. I thought of sharing it with him and asking him to putting it across in one of his meetings and applying too! Well, I need to think a bit for that but atleast I had the base material ready for that! Good!

Our gang really missed an important class. I so wanted to share all this with them. I for one had always loved Krishna only as God. But today to imagine him as a management Guru was a ‘cultural shock’ for me. It was amusing to imagine him in ‘jeans and T-shirt’ giving a PPT in some company meeting.

...contd....

Me, My Guru - Bhagavatam

Me, My Guru

Bhagavatam

Rahul had called to tell that he wouldn’t be able to come to class. It was so rare that he missed a class. It just can’t be anything simple that had come up – that was for sure!

Aziz smsed to give similar news. Did today have something common in store for these regulars I wondered! When I reached the class, to my amazement, I found Shruti, Geetha, Priya and even Murali absent. I called them up to get similar news. That was no coincidence, or was it?

Though there were others, I felt a bit alone today. I missed my ‘gang’ dearly today!

And to think just last class I thought I was in ‘space’ where I preferred being in ‘solitude’. I chuckled at this thought. No sooner did I ‘realize’ something about self, that I had found it to be ‘wrong’. Why was it so?

But, I actually was in ‘good space of wanting to be left alone’ just last week and here I was missing our Gang. What did it mean? Was what I felt then wrong or is this my imagination? I was confused. But before I could analyse my ‘state of confusion’, she came and took her seat and closed her eyes. Others took the clue and did like-wise. She didn’t say a word and yet..... People who were talking immediately went into silence. This was classic example of ‘lead by example’. I picked up this lesson today. But, it would be fruitful only if I can emulate this of ‘leading by example’ act in my official life. I was fed up of shouting, cajoling, bribing my juniors to streamline their acts. I had to put this to good use and get results. Otherwise, what is the purpose of coming here and learning from her if I couldn’t live by it and imbibe it in my character and way of living?

These were the thoughts that were playing in my mind when I closed my eyes with others. And as obvious I couldn’t meditate but had to open my eyes when I heard her voice “Hare Krishna hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna hare hare”.

“Krishna was beautiful 7-8 years old now full of mischief leading a gang of cowherd boys of more or less same age. He would along with others wait till maids left their homes to fill water from the river. Then he would with others enter the empty homes to steal his favourite butter. Now in those days, butter was kept in pots hanging from the ceiling. It was so high hung that only grown-ups would be able to reach up and get it! All the boys were disheartened. They knew they would never be able to get butter as promised by Krishna. They looked at Krishna with ‘sorry faces’ and were surprised when they saw Krishna holding flute in one hand and was hitting the other hand with it lightly with a smile on his lips.

...contd....