“If I am right, all others who don’t agree to my opinion aught to be wrong.”
“If he is right, I am wrong.”
“Only one of us can be right”
“Either he or I am right. Tell us who it is?”
This Belief System puts us on the defensive or aggressive side (depending upon my character) and I automatically consider the other to be my rival whom I need to prove wrong. But, it is not so. Both of us can be right individually and yet not agree with each other. For eg. When five blind men touch the elephant, first one said “elephant is so small and so thin (He was holding elephant’s tail). The second one said “No, certainly not. It is so huge and erect. He was holding the leg of the elephant. The third disagreed with both as he touched the trunk of the elephant and said “but it is so long, not so fat but yet thin and moving to and fro”. The fourth who was standing between two legs shouted at all the others calling them blind and said “the elephant is not as any of you say. It is like two pillars with space in between.” The fifth who touched the tummy brusted out laughing and said “Oh ye fools, elephant is oval in shape and spreads along the sides”. All of them were right, yet none of them knew that the other was also right. Similarly,
Upon the road of Kalinga, a traveler met a man who lived in a nearby village and the traveler pointing with his hand to a vast field asked the man saying “Was not this the battle-ground where King Ashoka overcame his enemies?”
And the man answered “this was never been a battle ground. This has never been a battle-ground. There once stood on this very field the great kingdom of Kanishka which was over-powered and plundered. But now, it is a good field, is it not?”
And the traveler and the man parted.
Not a half mile farther the traveler met another man and pointing to the field he again said “So this was where the kingdom of Kanishka was. Right?”
And that man immediately said “No, no. There never was Kanishka here. There was a monastery but was destroyed by people of foreign origin. And now, it is a great field.”
Now the traveler moved further along the road and sat down under the tree. There came a third man to whom the traveler said “So, there was a huge monastery as this place once?”
That man gave a odd look to the traveler and explained “There never was a monastery in this neighbourhood, but our forefathers have told us that once there fell a great meteor on this field.”
By now the traveler was totally confused. He met an old man who looked wise too. So he saluted him and asked him “sir, upon this road I have met three men who live in the neighbourhood and each denied what the other had to say about this field. Each in turn also had a new tale to tell that the other had not told. I am confused. Please enlighten me on this subject.”
The old man smiled and answered “ My friend, each and every one of these men told you what was indeed true; but few of us are able to add facts to different fact and make a truth complete thereof!”
Our opinions shouldn’t be our ego projections. They are at the end of the day only opinions which are bound to change over the period of time. Why be so protective about them? Opinions should help in knocking out our ignorance and help us in easing the situation and in bringing out the solutions to the fix we are in. Opinions shouldn’t be the problem creators, they are problem solvers.
Let us not identify ourselves with our opinions. They are ours. We are not because of them. We are not insulted if our opinions are rejected. Know this Truth. Apply it and become liberated.
The basis of any good relationship should be and can be only when we agree to disagree.
Any disagreements?
Revathi
“If he is right, I am wrong.”
“Only one of us can be right”
“Either he or I am right. Tell us who it is?”
This Belief System puts us on the defensive or aggressive side (depending upon my character) and I automatically consider the other to be my rival whom I need to prove wrong. But, it is not so. Both of us can be right individually and yet not agree with each other. For eg. When five blind men touch the elephant, first one said “elephant is so small and so thin (He was holding elephant’s tail). The second one said “No, certainly not. It is so huge and erect. He was holding the leg of the elephant. The third disagreed with both as he touched the trunk of the elephant and said “but it is so long, not so fat but yet thin and moving to and fro”. The fourth who was standing between two legs shouted at all the others calling them blind and said “the elephant is not as any of you say. It is like two pillars with space in between.” The fifth who touched the tummy brusted out laughing and said “Oh ye fools, elephant is oval in shape and spreads along the sides”. All of them were right, yet none of them knew that the other was also right. Similarly,
Upon the road of Kalinga, a traveler met a man who lived in a nearby village and the traveler pointing with his hand to a vast field asked the man saying “Was not this the battle-ground where King Ashoka overcame his enemies?”
And the man answered “this was never been a battle ground. This has never been a battle-ground. There once stood on this very field the great kingdom of Kanishka which was over-powered and plundered. But now, it is a good field, is it not?”
And the traveler and the man parted.
Not a half mile farther the traveler met another man and pointing to the field he again said “So this was where the kingdom of Kanishka was. Right?”
And that man immediately said “No, no. There never was Kanishka here. There was a monastery but was destroyed by people of foreign origin. And now, it is a great field.”
Now the traveler moved further along the road and sat down under the tree. There came a third man to whom the traveler said “So, there was a huge monastery as this place once?”
That man gave a odd look to the traveler and explained “There never was a monastery in this neighbourhood, but our forefathers have told us that once there fell a great meteor on this field.”
By now the traveler was totally confused. He met an old man who looked wise too. So he saluted him and asked him “sir, upon this road I have met three men who live in the neighbourhood and each denied what the other had to say about this field. Each in turn also had a new tale to tell that the other had not told. I am confused. Please enlighten me on this subject.”
The old man smiled and answered “ My friend, each and every one of these men told you what was indeed true; but few of us are able to add facts to different fact and make a truth complete thereof!”
Our opinions shouldn’t be our ego projections. They are at the end of the day only opinions which are bound to change over the period of time. Why be so protective about them? Opinions should help in knocking out our ignorance and help us in easing the situation and in bringing out the solutions to the fix we are in. Opinions shouldn’t be the problem creators, they are problem solvers.
Let us not identify ourselves with our opinions. They are ours. We are not because of them. We are not insulted if our opinions are rejected. Know this Truth. Apply it and become liberated.
The basis of any good relationship should be and can be only when we agree to disagree.
Any disagreements?
Revathi
