Right or Wrong!

 Right or Wrong!

Everyone says he is right and the other is wrong!?!

But, have you ever wondered "how come if I am right always, I end up being the 'sad, depressed, angry and frustrated' one in the relationship?"

think about it.........

On pain in love

 

contd.....

On pain in love

Stop labeling it as ‘but he is supposed to do this’ etc. Just live that relationship and reflect on who you are in that relationship. If you have become a better person, then you are living that relationship right. If you are becoming a bitter person, then you need to work on yourself and drop that attitude say like conditioning etc. Bye and by you will flower into a beautiful version of you. And a day would come when you will master the art of being with anyone and being happy! Is it not what everyone wants!

Relationships are not the 'magic lamp' that we can rub to have our wishes fulfilled. They are given to us to make us selfless, pure in intent, for us to learn to give, learn and unlearn from each other and just to have a playmate who would play along in this process.

Need is same. What needs to be done is also given now! Just do it. Yes, it may take longer than usual. But hey, what’s the hurry?

****

# on love, relationships, expectations, being happy in relationships, love and pain, pain and suffering, disappointment, 

also read : https://kantipadam.blogspot.com/search?q=the+only+survivor+of+the+shipwreck 

Read this link given above to also questions like : 

• How to believe when things don't go as per our wish?
• Why do things go bad even after believing or doing reiki?
• Ill-health and death are part and parcel of our life. Yet we don't accept it when it happens to us or our near ones. May be the problem is not in what is happening. It is in our conditioning of mind that labels disease and death as bad and evil. The day we shift our perception on death and disease then our faith is restored. Our depression goes for a toss. And we develop clarity of thought that can see all events of life as important part of our growth and journey.

Points to be taken from this post :

• Relationships are not to be 'USED' to fulfill our desires. 
• When we USE PEOPLE  in our life as a means to fulfill our demands and desires, we suffer. This is 'lustful' way of living any relationship.
• When we LOVE PEOPLE  and use things of the world to express it then we experience LOVE. Such are the people who are happy in every relationship of their life. The people in their life are ever desiring to be with them. The people in their life say 'the best time of my life is when I spend it with him/her'.
• Use things and love people in your life. That is the 'right way' of doing things. That is 'Dharma'.
• Using people to get things in your life is the usual way of doing things and that ALWAYS  ends up being painful and causing suffering.
• Like in everything we have two ways of doing things - the usual way and the right way. 
• Your choice decides your returns. 
• You can't walk one path and want the result of the other!
• You can't USE PEOPLE and then want affection, concern, respect, peace, contentment and love in life!

On comment :

"The link given of the previous post is long written ones and yet it is appreciated now and found useful now!"

It shows - We don't remember all that we have read. So it is advised to go to older posts and re-read them again and again.

What we have read then wouldn't have resonated with us then. But now with better clarity of thought we are able to understand the old posts. That's why I repeatedly ask you to go back to older posts.

The way you read it then and the way you get it now reflects the journey you have made. That reflects the distance covered by your clarity of thought. Kudos to that! People always ask "but what did I get doing reiki all this years? my 'this' wish is still pending?" The answer to that is 'this understanding that you lacked then'. Got it?!?

On pain in love

contd.....

 

On pain in love

The basis of this relationship is ‘expectation’. You consider the person as a means to fulfillment of your desires. You consider you being in that relationship as an ‘investment’. If it is an investment, there ought to be ‘losses’ too in that! And that is why we end up being in pain and we suffer in our relationships.

If there was ‘love’, IF, then there never would be pain and suffering – at least the kind you are experiencing and complaining about. When a person is in love, just being with the person he loves is enough. What we receive and not receive NEVER matters! IF it is love!

This doesn’t just apply to man-woman relationship. It applies to every relationship – parent-child, friends, office-work, we with our job, master-student, employee-employer, nation-citizen, pet-master, Guru-disciple, God-devotee.

Use every relationship as a mirror that reflects your character. See how you handle it. That will tell you where to build your character. It will reflect what you need to drop. Then every relationship will become beautiful and fruitful.

contd.....

# on love, relationships, expectations, being happy in relationships, love and pain, pain and suffering, disappointment, 

also read suggested : https://kantipadam.blogspot.com/search?q=Life+is+a+journey+of+joy

On pain in love

 

On pain in love

The major misconception about ‘love’ is that ‘it makes our life better’.

Many of the complaints ‘in love’ are –

·       I am unhappy because of him/her

·       He/she is not living up to my expectations

·       I ‘thought’ I’ll be happy marrying him but my parents were right. He is not right for me!!!

·       Why can’t she be just as I want her to be!

These are scores of such complaints. They all look different. But no! They all say the same “that I EXPECTED to be happy in this relationship but it is not happening. This person has let me down!”

Situation is real. Pain is also real. But the ‘basis’ of pain blame and suffering is not ‘love’. It is ‘expectation’.

When a person enters into a relationship – whichever be it, it is to fulfill his need or want – physical, emotional or financial. When the need or want is not fulfilled he thinks the other person does not ‘love’. Think about it! Sit in meditation! Question your anger and disappointment. And to get the answer you need to put your ‘logical mind’ that gives you instances where you have judged his ‘love’ for you based on what he did or didn’t do for you! Put that logical mind aside! Don’t support your anger or judgement! Just look honestly in to your emotions and their base.

contd.....

# on love, relationships, expectations, being happy in relationships, love and pain, pain and suffering, disappointment, 

also read suggested : https://kantipadam.blogspot.com/search?q=the+real+growth+is+in+letting+go 

Questions addressed : 

• Why is there so much of suffering in love?
• Why do I have such a family? If only my family was different, I would have been more happier!
• Who are the people who are happy after marriage?
• How come so many people are happy in their life?
• If only my desires were met I would be so happy and there would have been no need for me to be angry and mean in life...

Points to be taken :

• As long as my expectations, conditioning of mind and my attitude is what it is, I am bound to suffer with whomsoever I live with.
• Change the attitude and see the relationship change for better.
• Change in life partner will not bring any joy in life. Only change in attitude can bring that joy in life.
• So we better change it with the present person and experience happiness.
• Sit with your parents to know their complaints about you. Then look at your complaints that you have with your kids. You will find it funny that it is more or less the same.
• You came out right (as per your idea!) so would your kid. So relax and just love your child. And before long he shapes up better than your fears and beyond your expectations!

Leather goods : They are those made from skin of cow, goat, camel and such animals. Bags, jackets. dresses, belts, bicycle seats and many more products are made up of these animal skin. The animal is sometimes even skinned alive and prone to slow and painful deaths. Sometimes, animal is killed just for its skin. Both ways it seems useless to buy leather bags and purses by killing these innocent animals. Google on leather and you'll find all the further info needed ......

On Chanting!

 

 Contd.....

On Chanting!

Sit in meditation. Look within. You’ll find your answers, solutions and root cause of all your problems within you ONLY! No amount of pointing fingers at others is going to solve any of your problems. Own up your attitude. Look at it. Understand yourself before crying about your life. The day you look at yourself and know your attitude which is stopping from letting abundance come into your life, your healing will happen instantly and your life will change for better faster than you can imagine.

OR

You can quietly skip this post and keep up with your demanding, crying and accusing nature.

See what attitude to drop and what to pick. Make right choices. YOU are to live with your choices. So be good to yourself. Make right choices.

And making right choices will come with regular healing that will eventually heal your ‘psychic impressions’ that is clouding your ‘clarity of thought’.

So be in sadhan till ‘clarity of thought’ comes!

***  

# on giving and receiving, giving without expectations, intention and its effect on receiving, expectations and receipt, life and its rules, laws of nature, abundance and its secret...

also read previous post : https://kantipadam.blogspot.com/search?q=old+woman+had+two+daughters

How was this post useful to you?

What are the points you understood?

Do you have any questions?

On Chanting!

 

 Contd.....

On Chanting!

One is bitter and complaining. He is ever demanding with /but I didn’t receive this or such things /experiences didn’t happen to me’. He is looking at what others have and desires what others have.

But the other is sensitive and so validates what Reiki/guru/god does to them. They are expressive of their blessings received. They look at every small receipt and sing praises of His Grace. When they see others receiving too, they see His Grace even in that! And hence their hearts is filled with joy and eyes wet with tears of joy – for they see His Love in all these acts!

Now, who is qualified to let miracles work through them?

Right from I dg reiki class we are told, reminded that basis of all our ‘karma’ is attitude. Now, do you see the link between the attitudes and ‘act that we perform’.

In the guise of questions you throw so many accusations like :

“….but maam, such big big things happen to them and to me even small things don’t happen…”

“ ..i hate God/guru. Inspite of doing pooja worth Rs. X he doesn’t fulfill my wishes…”

“I hate my Guru for making me do sadhan. I hate sadhan. I don’t want to change. I hate her for giving explanations to my questions….”

 Contd.....

# on giving and receiving, giving without expectations, intention and its effect on receiving, expectations and receipt, life and its rules, laws of nature, abundance and its secret...

also read suggested : https://kantipadam.blogspot.com/search?q=saint 

Questions addressed : 

• What is seva?
• How should one do seva?
• How seva benefits us?
• Why seva is an integral part of Eastern spiritual practices?
• Is giving physical?

Points to be understood :

• Every act in our daily life can be turned into sadhan - an act of worship. One can be in sadhan through all the acts of livelihood. But the key is to know the secret of doing the act 'right'.
• By saying 'I am doing without expecting anything maam, then why I am not getting what I desire or why am I suffering in my life?' seems to be contradictory - isn't it?
• Sit in meditation atleast for 15 minutes per day for atleast 7 days and try to find out a. how you feel while performing an act (pick up any act of the day for this exercise) b. Can you change the way you feel for better while doing the job? c. How would you feel if you change the way you feel while performing the job?
• Then try to apply it in your life. See if there is any change.

On Chanting!

 

 Contd.....

On Chanting!

One person does sadhan just to change his attitude. He accepts flaw in his attitude. He seeks ‘mercy’ in exchange for his sadhan.

While the Other person thinks he is ‘right’ and deserves to receive he demands his wishes.

Who do you think receives ‘blessings’ in the form of wish fulfillment?

The other agrees that he is not with right attitude. He is ever working on his attitude. He just ‘serves’ as a way to give back for all he has received. Who receives abundance?

One is grateful even for the pain and suffering and is ever singing praises of the Lord for being with him.

While the other starts his statement with ‘yes, yes, I agree I received but….’. By saying but he is ever negating all that is given to him by the ‘Lord’. What is the attitude that his every complaint and his whiny nature expresses?

Now, you tell which attitude will attract more miracles in his life?

One is counting his blessing, while the other his ‘yet to be fulfilled list of desires’. Who do you think is genuinely grateful?

One is bitter and complaining. He is ever demanding with /but I didn’t receive this or such things /experiences didn’t happen to me’. He is looking at what others have and desires what others have. 

 Contd.....

# on giving and receiving, giving without expectations, intention and its effect on receiving, expectations and receipt, life and its rules, laws of nature, abundance and its secret...

also read suggested : https://kantipadam.blogspot.com/search?q=Let+his+will+be+mine+-+sufi+saint

Questions addressed : 

• Why do miracles happen so often in some peoples' life while others are ever complaining of never having experienced it?
• Does miracle happen to all?
• How are intent and character connected? 
• How is character basis of our destiny or what we receive?

Points to address :

• Why do we turn blind eye to our intent?
• When we complain we look at what others receive and what we desire. If only we look at what their intent and attitude is and what our intent is, we would unlock the key to abundance in our life?
• Use your mind the right way. Let your question show you where your problem is. Now your question points accusing fingers at others. Change that. 
• If you want results like others, also develop their attitude.